Pausing on doubts

I hate to second-guess myself.  I do not want to spend my time wondering if I made the wrong choice or fretting about the possibility I’ve traveled down the wrong path.  However, at one point or another in life, we wrestle with questions like these: Did I choose the right career?  Should we have bought that house instead of this one?  Did I marry the right person?  Was it wrong to _________?  What if I had said ________?

We could spin ourselves in circles with questions like those.

While we try to be as informed as possible when we make life-altering decisions, later on we are often faced with a moment that causes us to question our choices.  Doubt is powerful, and our circumstances play a huge part in how influential our doubts become.

But then there’s an even bigger doubt we sometimes face…one that we may publicly acknowledge does happen to people, but we are terrified to admit when we are the ones struggling with it…what about doubting God?  Doubting that I’m following Him like I’m supposed to.  Doubting the ministry that I’m working for.  Doubting that He really loves us or even exists.

I find it interesting that one of Jesus’ disciples, Thomas, gets the doubt-label “Doubting Thomas”, when there was an equally famous believer who did not get labeled as a doubter, even though he too struggled with doubting that Jesus was the Messiah.

I’m talking about John the Baptist.  For a quick review, let’s look at John’s resume: he was Jesus’ cousin, his birth was announced by an angel who prophesized a powerful Spirit-filled life, never had fermented drink, considered to be a prophet by the people, preached in the wilderness of the Messiah’s coming, persuaded countless numbers of people to turn from their sins in anticipation of the Messiah’s arrival and the introduction of the Kingdom of God on earth.  John the Baptist was the first to declare to the masses who Jesus was and what His mission would be – behold the lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world (John 1:29)– John also had the honor of baptizing Jesus.  Throughout his life, John did what God asked him to do, and he did it well. 

But the physical Kingdom of God didn’t show up with the Messiah’s arrival.  The established political and religious power structures remained in place…and the people at the top didn’t like John and his message.  So King Herod had John thrown into prison.

Let’s pause right here.  Put yourself in John’s place.  Everything you have done in your life and for God was supposed to lead up to the Messiah’s arrival.  And everyone believed that when the Messiah appeared, His purpose would be to setup the literal, physical Kingdom of God on Earth.  But that hasn’t happened…the circumstances John has been expecting – and telling others to expect – hadn’t come.  What is John thinking as time slowly passes in prison?  What would you be thinking?

Did I do the right thing?  Was I wrong about the Kingdom being at hand?  Is Jesus the Messiah we’ve been waiting for?

We don’t know how long John stewed over these questions, but at some point, he decided to get some clarity:

Matthew 11:1-3
When Jesus had finished giving instructions to His twelve disciples, He moved on from there to teach and preach in their towns.  Now when John heard in prison what the Christ was doing, he sent a message through his disciples and asked Him, “Are you the One who is to come, or should we expect someone else?”

John’s question is a big one.  Essentially, he’s asking Jesus: Are you who you say you are?  Can I trust you to do what you’ve said you will do?

I think all Christians struggle with this at some point in their life.  Maybe we’re too scared to say it out loud, but when our expectations of God are not met…it can lead to some serious inner turmoil, especially when our circumstances are the opposite of how we thought God would come through.

We typically don’t verbalize our struggle because we don’t want to look bad in front of other believers.  Or we may have heard a preacher lay on a guilt-trip, extra-thick, for anyone who expresses any level of doubt toward God.  We try to laugh off our silent struggle by saying that we don’t want to get “struck by lightning” and have the situation become worse because we’ve verbally questioned God and His purposes.

But what does God think of our doubts?  How does He handle our struggles?  Let’s look at how Jesus replied to John’s question:

Matthew 11:4-6
Jesus replied to them, “Go and report to John what you hear and see: The blind receive their sight, the lame walk, those with leprosy are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the poor are told the good news, and blessed is the one who isn’t offended by Me.”

Jesus doesn’t respond with lightning bolts.  He doesn’t even get angry.  Note, too, that Jesus does not explain or justify His current actions in light of John’s expectations.  Instead, Jesus points John back to the Scriptures, back to what Isaiah prophesied about the coming Messiah:

The blind receive their sight (Isaiah 29:18, 35:5),
the lame walk (Isaiah 35:6),
those with leprosy are cleansed (Isaiah 53:4),
the deaf hear (Isaiah 29:18-19, 35:5),
the dead are raised (Isaiah 26:18-19),
and the poor are told the good news (Isaiah 61:1)

That is an impressive list, and since Jesus was doing all these things, He certainly answers John’s question…but then Jesus finishes off His answer with a promise: and blessed is the one who isn’t offended by Me. 

The word blessed used here is the same as what Jesus said in His beatitudes (Blessed is the one who… from Matthew 5).  Jesus is telling John that He is the promised Messiah, but there is a blessing for those who do not get tripped up over how and when Jesus is undertaking His Messiah responsibilities.

Be sure to read that last part – and blessed is the one who isn’t offended by Me – as a promise and not a put-down, because of what Jesus then said about John to the crowds:

Matthew 11:11, 13-14
Truly I tell you, among those born of women no one greater than John the Baptist has appeared…for all the prophets and the law prophesied until John.  And if you’re willing to accept it, he is the Elijah who is to come.

Even after John’s struggle with doubt, Jesus still called him the greatest prophet.  For all the miraculous works and Messiah-is-coming teaching brought by the earlier prophets, John alone can claim that he was the final Old Testament prophet.  To herald the Messiah’s arrival is a privilege and honor afforded only to John.

What this shows us is that God can handle our doubts.  It’s ok to bring them to Him.  While God isn’t obligated to justify His actions, we can rely on the promises He has already made to us in Scripture.  And even when – not if – we struggle with doubt, God is still willing to bless us as we wait for Him to do what He has said He will do.

Keep Pressing,
Ken