No, God doesn’t think you’re a badass

Over the years, I’ve seen this meme make the rounds of social media multiple times:

God only gives us what we can handle.
Apparently, God thinks I’m a badass.

We might snicker at this (I did), but after reading it, it’s very easy to puff out our chests a little bit and think, “Yeah.  Look at all the crap I’ve dealt with.  God must think I’m pretty tough to handle going through this.”

The problem with this kind of thinking is that it is very self-centered – which is the total opposite of what is taught by God in the Scriptures.  Here are examples from both the Old Testament and New Testament:

Proverbs 16:18
Pride comes before destruction,
and an arrogant spirit before a fall.

James 4:6
But He gives greater grace.  Therefore He says:

God resists the proud
but gives grace to the humble.

So…this notion of “God only gives us what we can handle” must’ve come from somewhere, right?  Then where did people get the idea from?

Turns out that “God only gives us what we can handle” is based upon Scripture, from one of Paul’s letters to the believers in a town named Corinth…but it’s a verse that’s been twisted a bit.  Here’s the actual text:

1 Corinthians 10:13
No temptation has come upon you except what is common to humanity.  But God is faithful; He will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation He will also provide the way out so that you may be able to bear it.

While you can see how “God will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able…to bear” can morph into “God only gives you what you can handle” – it’s also pretty clear that Paul is not talking about all of life’s circumstances that come our way.  Paul’s only talking about the times that we are tempted to do the wrong thing…and God’s help in this will be to provide the way out (even if the way He provides isn’t a way we would prefer to go).

And lest you think that it’s ok to stretch this verse to include any/all of life’s circumstances…Paul’s own experiences warn us how that’s not accurate.  In a second letter he wrote to the believers in Corinth, Paul had this to tell them:

2 Corinthians 1:8
We don’t want you to be unaware, brothers and sisters, of our affliction that took place in Asia.  We were completely overwhelmed – beyond our strength – so that we even despaired of life itself. 

That sounds like they got more affliction than they could handle.  Paul continued:

2 Corinthians 1:9
Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death, so that we would not trust in ourselves but in God who raises the dead.

Paul recognized that if they puffed out their chests and relied on how tough they were, they were as good as dead.  Looking back, Paul sees that God allowed a completely overwhelming situation so that they would not trust in [themselves] but in God.  Because they humbled themselves, here’s the lesson they learned…and were later able to teach:

2 Corinthians 1:10-11
He has delivered us from such a terrible death, and He will deliver us.  We have put our hope in Him that He will deliver us again while you join in helping us by your prayers.  Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gift that came to us through the prayers of many.

Paul learned that their completely overwhelming circumstance not only brought his team closer to God, but it also provided an opportunity for others to see God in action as He answers prayers.  That is a great way to look at our suffering and trials and difficulties in life – they can drive us (and others) closer to God, but not if we attack them with a puffed up sense of self.

So no, God does not think you’re a badass.  In fact, He knows for certain that none of us are.  Life is going to beat us down, sometimes to the point where we despair of life itself.  But that doesn’t mean we’re abandoned…instead, we can be like Paul and not trust in ourselves but in God who raises the dead.  If He can raise the dead – and He can – then He can handle getting us through whatever life throws our way.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

I don't know why you struggle

I’ve had glasses since I was in Kindergarten.  I’ve always detested them.  Not because of how they look, but I’ve always wanted to be able to wake up and see everything clearly.  I hate not being able to rest without smashing my glasses into my face or into the side of my head.  My frustration came to a boil in junior high, and I can still remember one exasperated conversation I had with God about it.  I wanted to be healed.  I wanted to see normally, clearly – like everyone else.  I prayed, hard.  I knew God was capable of correcting my eyesight.  I was familiar with the number of stories where Jesus healed the blind.  In desperation, I offered to give God “all the praise and glory” if He would just fix me.  But nothing changed.  No healing came, despite the number of times I shut my eyes hard and reopened them quickly, just hoping that one of those times…I’d be able to see.

I also deal with a shoulder that’s prone to dislocation, frequent migraines, and essential tremor.  Within my family, there are issues with bi-polar, various cancers, MS, fibromyalgia, high blood pressure, and Alzheimer’s (just to name a few).  I’m sure you could add your own experiences to this list.

Throughout the centuries, people have struggled with explaining why some of us deal with physical, mental, and emotional brokenness and pains.  Most explanations from able-bodied people to the disabled or impaired boil down to some form of “well, sucks to be you”.  Other explanations we may assume about ourselves are that “God is punishing me” or that “my parents messed up and I’m the one paying for it”.  Acknowledging that the world is broken may help explain the mess of aliments we see, but it doesn’t make the day-to-day activities any easier for those living with their issue.  It’s also hard to reconcile being told that we are “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14) with our list of struggles.

When we look in the Bible, we find that we’re not alone as we try to understand the imbalances we see in society:

John 9:1-2
As [Jesus] was passing by, He saw a man blind from birth.  His disciples asked Him: “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”

In first-century Jewish thinking, somebody must have messed up for this guy to be blind.  Blindness was viewed as a punishment from God.  So this would have been a natural question for the disciples to ask Jesus.  However, the answer He gave them was not one they were expecting:

John 9:3
“Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” Jesus answered.  “This came about so that God’s works might be displayed in him.”

Jesus then healed the man.  For the first time in his life, he could see clearly.  As you can imagine, this drastic change caused quite a stir among the community – especially with the religious leaders, who made the same assumptions the disciples had about the reason for the man’s blindness.

A second example I want to look at is the Apostle Paul.  When God called Paul to be His ambassador to the Gentile nations, He gave Paul specific revelations and teaching.  However, this was not the only thing God gave him:

2 Corinthians 12:7
Therefore, so that I would not exalt myself, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to torment me so that I would not exalt myself.

Paul never specified what the thorn in the flesh actually was.  Most scholars think it was some physical malady, along the lines of chronic eye issues, malaria, migraines, epilepsy, or a speech disability.  Even though the thorn’s purpose was clear – so that he wouldn’t become conceited – Paul still didn’t want it. 

2 Corinthians 12:8-9
Concerning this, I pleaded with the Lord three times that it would leave me.  But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is perfected in weakness.”

In these two examples, neither person did something to cause their physical failings or situation.  Instead, God had a purpose and a plan that actually included their struggles. 

Could the same be said of us?  I don’t know why I have the struggles that I do.  I can’t explain yours, either.  But here’s what I think is a strong possibility.  While I don’t have any direct Biblical evidence of this, given what I know of the character of God, it would not surprise me: I think that sometimes, when God sees the results of sin in this world and a non-believer gets cancer, He allows one of His own children to have that same cancer.  Not out of punishment or spite, but so that the world can see the difference in how those two individuals handle it.  So that whether you have always struggled or a specific event caused your struggle – God’s comfort, strength, compassion, and ability to change a life will shine through His kids...even though we would not have chosen our situation or we ask God to take it away.

I can’t say for sure why you have to deal with anxiety, or depression, or same-sex attraction, or cerebral palsy, or lust, or pride, or anger, or colon cancer, or any other struggle.  But God knows how you can partner with Him through it.  However life is hard for us, we can still choose our attitude about it.  May we make the same choice that Paul did after God told Him three times, “No, I won’t take it away.”  Instead of being down on himself, Paul recognized that this area of his life was where God was most visibly at work.  Not to indulge himself or give into his area of difficulty, but that God’s power helped him overcome and do great things, despite the struggle:

2 Corinthians 12:9-10
Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may reside in me.  So I take pleasure in weakness, insults, hardships, persecutions, and in difficulties, for the sake of Christ.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

I know what that's like

We are relational beings.  We have an innate desire to connect and relate to others.  Even for those of us who claim “I don’t like people” or that “I’m happier to be alone”, if we’re honest, we’re more interested in managing the who/when/where of interacting with others than we are looking to cut off all connections with the rest of humanity.

Relationships are built on similarities.  When we first meet someone, the purpose of our early conversation is to probe for connection points: What kind of work do you do?  Are you married?  Do you have any kids?  Have you lived here long?  Where did you live previously?  What school did you go to?  What sports teams do you cheer for?  How do you spend your spare time?

As soon as they mention a similarity, we jump in with a “Me, too!”. 

Early on in any relationship (be it romantic, friendship, coworker, etc.), the similarities we acknowledge are typically positive ones.  While sports teams and having same-aged children are common points of connection, any life event can become something that builds a relationship.  Interviewing and getting a new job, purchasing a car, and going back to school are all experiences that others have had.  These are situations were we can reach out and relate to someone else, either for advice or just to talk through the situation, because we know they’ve been through it before.

However, the deeper a relationship goes, the more likely we are willing to share the “Me, too’s” of life’s painful situations. 

·       When a family member gets cancer, you’re grateful for everyone who is empathetic and offers to pray, but how much more comforting is it when that one friend says, “I’ve been there”?

·       When your child is struggling at school, the failed assignments keep piling up, and the stress level in your home continues to climb, how relieving is it to hear, “When my child was in that grade, we went through the same thing”?

·       When there’s a death in the family, especially your immediate family, the condolences offered take on a different meaning when the person offering sympathy has lost the same loved one in their own family.

In the difficult moments, the experience of others is what can keep us going and help us get through.  Other coping mechanisms aren’t anywhere near as helpful as being able to relate with another human who has had similar experiences.  Finding others with similar stories doesn’t necessarily fix the problem, but it brings a level of comfort that you can’t find in positive self-talk, escapism, or distractions.

The Apostle Paul talked about this kind of relationship sharing in his letter to the believers in Corinth:

2 Corinthians 1:3-4
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort.  He comforts us in all our affliction…

Now, these verses would have been perfectly fine if Paul had stopped here.  The promise that God would comfort us in all our affliction is one that we can gladly take to the bank.  This promise does not mean that God will always remove us from our difficult situation, but it does mean that He will be with us as we live through it.

While it would be good news with just this statement alone, Paul continued:

He comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any kind of affliction, through the comfort we ourselves receive from God.

Do you see?  Our pain has a purpose.

Too many of us want to avoid pain at all costs.  If it cannot be avoided outright, then we try to escape as soon as possible, or even drown the pain with some opposite pleasure.

But the cure for pain isn’t pleasure, it’s purpose.

As God provides comfort for us as we go through life’s storms, our experience becomes a resource that we can then share with others.  The God of all comfort gives us consolation, reassurance, and hope as we deal with all our afflictions…and through these difficult circumstances, He provides an example for us to later give that same comfort to others.

One last critical observation – notice that the comfort God provides will enable us to comfort those who are in any kind of affliction.  The important word to notice is the word any.  We don’t have to have an identical “Me, too” in order to provide consolation, reassurance, and hope to others.

But we must be willing to share the stuff we’ve gone through, the difficulties we’ve faced, and the comfort God provided during those times.  Doing so gives purpose to our pain, and God’s comfort to those who need it.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Delayed due to illness

My apologies, I have not been well lately. This is also why most of October consisted of “Flashback Favorites”. I hope to get back on schedule soon, but the next post for my current study is not ready yet. So, instead of a Flashback Favorite, this time I will simply give you the passage I have been dwelling on while I am not feeling my best:

2 Corinthians 4:15-18
Indeed, everything is for your benefit so that, as grace extends through more and more people, it may cause thanksgiving to increase to the glory of God. Therefore we do not give up. Even though our outer person is being destroyed, our inner person is being renewed day by day.

For our momentary light affliction is producing for us an absolutely incomparable eternal weight of glory. So we do not focus on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

A malfunctioning body can be difficult to deal with…and yet, Paul confidently states that God will use everything for [our] benefit.

How will we know when our unwanted difficulties are actually beneficial? When we see the glory of God. Then, together, we can give thanks for everything we’ve gone through.

Therefore we do not give up. Illness is temporary, and we’re to be focused on the eternal.

Keep Pressing,
Ken