I called Jesus' disciples schmucks. That wasn't well received.

During a conversation about Jesus, His ministry, and His disciples with a Mormon missionary, I made an off-hand, but accurate, statement:

Jesus’ disciples weren’t perfect.  They had their flaws, just like we do.  Let’s be honest, they were schmucks before meeting Jesus.

His body stiffened, he sat up straight, and I could tell he was trying to choose his next words carefully.  Through clenched teeth, he seethed, “These men, these ‘schmucks’ as you call them, were holy men of God.  I don’t appreciate you talking about them like that.” 

While I recognized his desire to be respectful of biblical figures, he had been talking about the disciples as if they were somehow god-like themselves.  So obviously, my labeling of them as schmucks struck a nerve.

In case you’re not familiar with the term, schmuck is a belittling or derogatory term that can range in meaning from stupid/foolish to obnoxious/detestable.

I then pointed out that none of the disciples were in positions of power when they met Jesus and began to follow Him.  They were regular guys with low-level jobs they were expected to work the rest of their lives.  They were fishermen, tax collectors, failed insurrectionists…and all of them were well past the age when a rabbi would have chosen them to be a disciple.  They were passed over by the elites because they weren’t good enough – they didn’t have the aptitude or the ability expected of those who would become part of the religious and political leadership of the nation.  The disciples were the cast-offs, the b-team, the overlooked, and the ignored.

But when Jesus chose them to be His disciples, they didn’t instantly become perfect, either.  All throughout Jesus’ ministry, we see them being selfish and self-promoting, even amongst themselves.  They failed to be like Jesus, many times over.  They fought over who would be the greatest among them (Mark 9:33-34, Luke 22:24), had family petition for their rank in Jesus’ Kingdom (Mark 10:35-41), they didn’t believe Jesus could keep them safe (Matthew 8:26, 14:31), they couldn’t heal a sick child (Mark 17:16), they ran away and deserted Jesus when He was arrested (Matthew 26:56), and although Peter literally swore that he didn’t even know Jesus (Mark 14:71), the other disciples were too busy hiding so they wouldn’t be confronted at all (John 20:19).

Even after Jesus returned to Heaven and the disciples received the Holy Spirit, they still weren’t perfect.  Jesus had to correct Peter on which people groups were allowed to hear the gospel (Acts 10:9-16).  Later still, Peter succumbed to peer pressure and hypocritically began to follow the Mosaic Law again, separating himself from non-Jews…and he was rebuked by Paul for it (Galatians 2:11-14).

All-in-all…that’s pretty schmucky.

But schmucky people are the ones that God often calls to do great things for Him.  In fact, Paul reminded the believers in Corinth of this very fact:

1 Corinthians 1:26-28
Brothers and sisters, consider your calling: Not many were wise from a human perspective, not many powerful, not many of noble birth.  Instead, God has chosen what is foolish in the world to shame the wise, and God has chosen what is weak in the world to shame the strong.  God has chosen what is insignificant and despised in the world – what is viewed as nothing – to bring to nothing what is viewed as something

A few members in the Corinthian church may have been considered “wise” or “powerful” or “noble” – but most weren’t.  God accepts everyone who believes in Jesus for eternal life, but He often elevates the lowly in ways that might not be expected.  But why would He do that?  Continuing with Paul’s letter, we find out:

1 Corinthians 1:29-31
so that no one may boast in His presence.  It is from Him that you are in Christ Jesus, who became wisdom from God for us – our righteousness, sanctification, and redemption – in order that, as it is written: Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.

God doesn’t elevate individuals so other people can marvel at how great a person the individual is…rather He elevates the lowly schmucks so that other people can see how great God is and what His power can accomplish. 

I think our lesson here is two-fold:

1.       Don’t put anyone – not even one of the original disciples – on a pedestal.  We’re all sinners saved by God’s gracious gift of Jesus.
2.       When God elevates you, don’t point to yourself (even if other people do)…instead, point them to God.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Impromptu concerts and bitter substitutes

I came across an interesting series of videos on YouTube recently.  A young guy with a guitar walks up to random strangers – typically young women – who are sitting in public and asks what their favorite song is.  Whatever they say, he plays and sings it for them.  He’s an above-average-looking guy, but his singing talent is very good.  The premise of his videos is the same every time, but I’ve found the people’s reactions to be quite fascinating.

First off, the people are always grateful for the impromptu mini-concert.  Obviously, they were not expecting to be serenaded by a random stranger with one of their favorite songs.  When he’s done playing, he gets up and wishes them a good rest of their day.  He doesn’t ask for anything or make any romantic advances.  Many tell him “thanks, you too” and that’s the end.  However, many of the young women are so shocked by his performance that you can watch them swoon over him as he plays and sings.  They stop whatever they’re doing and either begin to subconsciously adjust their outfit or start fiddling with their hair.

Now, whenever he serenades a couple, their reaction isn’t so much toward him as it is toward each other.  The song becomes a catalyst that brings them together, instead of drawing them in closer to the singer.  You can tell that their relationship buckets have been filled by each other – there is no room for anyone else.  The flip-side, though, with the young women who become instantly infatuated with this crooner would indicate that their relationship bucket is running near empty – and the sudden appearance of a talented guy who sings a part of a song for them makes them want more.  Many ask him for his Snap, phone number, or even if he’s available for coffee right then.  They don’t know anything about him or if he’s a quality person, but they are drawn away by the attention he’s unexpectedly given them.

And I don’t make these observations as a knock on these women, either.  I have known guys who are so starved for positive attention, that if a girl so much as smiles at them, they suddenly believe they have found “the one.”  Being in a relationship deficit can make any of us vulnerable to unexpected situations and cause us to overestimate the “good” of a person or situation.

A couple of days ago, I came across this proverb and instantly thought of these videos:

Proverbs 27:7
A person who is full tramples on a honeycomb,
but to a hungry person, any bitter thing is sweet.

The singer may be a great guy, but to the girl who is fulfilled in her relationship, she has no room for him, regardless of how talented he is.  However, to those who are relationally starved, they instantly craved more of his attention – even though they didn’t know if his companionship would be bitter or sweet.

From here, I couldn’t help but think about my relationship with God.  When He and I spend time together, I am so full relationally at a deep-soul-level that when distractions or temptations come my way, I am not swayed.  However, if I have been neglecting to spend time with Him – reading the Scriptures to find out about Him, praying to Him about what’s on my heart and asking to be shown what’s on His, and spending time in community with other believers – if I am not pursuing Him, then I am easily swayed and taken away by time wasters, twisted emotions, and self-centered thoughts.

When I find my “why” and purpose in the one who designed those things in me, I am too full of Him to be distracted by anything else.  God pursues relationship with us because that’s what He made us for – we are at our designed best when we are in full, intimate relationship with Him.  So, please take a practical step to engage with Him today.  Our best defense against a life of bitter substitutes isn’t to work harder to avoid them, but to be so full in our relationship with God that any substitute won’t satisfy.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

An old story example (part 1)

I don’t imagine that you’ve spent much time reading the Old Testament book 1 Chronicles.  Don’t worry, no judgment here…I’m not in it very often, either.  And if you’re like me, when you read through any Old Testament book, it’s very tempting to just skim past the genealogy sections, right?  So-and-so begat son-of-so-and-so, name-I-can’t-possibly-pronounce had a son with-another-name-I-can’t-pronounce.

However, genealogy sections were vitally important to the ancient Israelites.  Knowing where you came from had significant influence on your social standing.  Even though we can’t trace our own lineage back through those genealogies, that doesn’t necessarily mean those sections are empty of anything useful for us church-age believers.  While there are a lifetime of stories behind each name…oftentimes, there are interesting stories couched in between the lists of family lineage.  As the Apostle Paul said, the Old Testament is available to us for examples and insight into the God who loves us (1 Corinthians 10:11).

So, I want to share with you two little stories I found amongst the genealogies.  I think you’ll find them as interesting and as informative as I did.  We’ll look at the first one in this post and the second one in the next post.  The first story shows three of the twelve tribes establishing themselves in the Promised Land, but the local inhabitants weren’t willing to just hand it over.  As you read the following five verses, look for the reason why the three tribes were successful:

1 Chronicles 5:18-22
The descendants of Reuben and Gad and half the tribe of Manasseh had 44,760 warriors who could serve in the army – men who carried shield and sword, drew the bow, and were trained for war.  They waged war against the Hagrites, Jetur, Naphish, and Nodab.  They received help against these enemies because they cried out to God in battle, and the Hagrites and all their allies were handed over to them.  He was receptive to their prayer because they trusted in Him.  They captured the Hagrites livestock – fifty thousand of their camels, two hundred fifty thousand sheep, and two thousand donkeys – as well as one hundred thousand people.  Many of the Hagrites were killed because it was God’s battle.  And they lived there in the Hagrites place until the exile.

Over 44,000 warriors…that’s a lot of skilled fighters; however, that wasn’t the primary reason they won the battle.  The three Israelite tribes were victorious because they cried out to God in battle…He was receptive to their prayer because they trusted in Him.  Despite their numbers and strength, their winning strategy contained two humility-filled steps: crying out to God and trusting in Him.  Not only did they seek God’s favor and assistance, they were counting on Him to fulfill the promises He had made to all the Israelite tribes (see Genesis 12, Genesis 26:3, Genesis 28:13, Numbers 34:1-12 for a few examples).

Since God had promised the land, the three tribes knew they couldn’t obtain the promise fulfillment without God’s involvement.  After the battle was over and the three Israelite tribes had won and taken control of the land, they recognized that it had been God’s battle all along.

Now, of course, us modern-day believers cannot claim this promise from God.  We’re not Israel, and God isn’t going to move us all to Palestine.  That said…what a great example this is for us…we can take this little snippet of history and be reminded that God fulfills His promises.  God keeps His word.  People may have lied to us.  Others may have let us down.  Our God isn’t like that.  He doesn’t leave us in the lurch.  He won’t forget.  God is good for His word, every time.

So, what promises are you crying out to God about?  What promises are you trusting in Him to fulfill?  We can’t do it on our own, no matter how skilled we are.  If you need a reminder, here are a few to consider:

Matthew 11:28-30
Come to Me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take up my yoke and learn from Me, because I am lowly and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.

John 5:24
Truly I tell you, anyone who hears My word and believes Him who sent Me has eternal life and will not come under judgment but has passed from death to life.

Hebrews 13:5-6
Keep your life free from the love of money.  Be satisfied with what you have for He Himself has said, I will never leave you or abandon you.  Therefore, we may boldly say, “The Lord is my helper, I will not be afraid.  What can man do to me?”

There are many more promises available to us, and I encourage you to look for them as you read through the New Testament.  But let’s take the Old Testament story as our example, alright?  Cry out to God and trust in Him to fulfill the promises He’s made.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Ken's TOP 10 (#1-5)

This month marks 10 YEARS since I took over THE WORD full time.  Crazy, I know!

In celebration of this milestone, I’m counting down the TOP 10 blog posts from the last 10 years.  To be honest, the process of choosing them was a lot harder than I expected.  It was like being forced to pick your favorite child or rank your best memories with your spouse.  There were a lot to choose from, because God’s taught me so much! 

My criteria included aspects like:
·       Biggest lessons God has taught me
·       Memorable ways I’ve had God’s truth play out in my life
·       Posts that I’ve returned to, in order to remind myself of what I’ve learned
·       Most popular posts via web search, clicks from email, or comments back from y’all

Last week, we went through the list, from #10 to #6. If you missed it, you can check it out here.  Without further ado, let’s countdown from #5 to #1 (click each title to link to the post):

#5
Dance floors and lampstands, posted on January 17, 2019 – A special night out with my wife showed my coworkers a side of me they hadn’t seen before.  It also provided a lasting lesson on how focusing on God creates a memorable witness to those around you.

#4
Coming out of the detour, posted on July 13, 2017 – I lost my job, and as a result, we knew we would have to move to a new state.  But where to go next proved harder to figure out than I thought it would.  And my wrestling with God was more intense than I ever thought possible…He provided, but on His terms and not mine.

#3
More than just thoughts and prayers, posted on May 26, 2022 – the Uvalde elementary school shooting struck a deep cord in me, and I was increasingly frustrated by the standard “thoughts and prayers” response of so many.  I believe I found the solution to school shootings…it may feel like a big ask, but big problems require all of us to step up.

#2
One year later – Joe Rheney has relocated to Heaven, posted on January 10, 2019 – on the one year anniversary of my mentor’s funeral, I posted this remembrance of the day we laid his body to rest.  It also includes the eulogy I gave at his funeral service, which answers the question “What does Christian discipleship look like?”  This post explains how the originator of THE WORD influenced my life’s path.

#1
The greatest reward possible, posted on September 26, 2019 – Our eternal destiny is secure when we believe in Jesus for eternal life (John 3:16), but did you know that God promises additional eternal rewards for those who serve Him well in this life?  These are greater rewards than I ever imagined, and God offers the opportunity to all believers.  You need to check out this post, I wouldn’t want you to miss out.  Understanding this concept changes the way we walk the Christian life.

I hope you take the time to read at least one of these, and I pray that resharing what I’ve learned will be helpful to you, as well.

Thank you for walking with me all these years! 

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Ken’s TOP 10 (#6-10)

This month marks 10 YEARS since I took over THE WORD full time.  Crazy, I know!

In celebration of this milestone, I’m counting down the TOP 10 blog posts from the last 10 years.  To be honest, the process of choosing them was a lot harder than I expected.  It was like being forced to pick your favorite child or rank your best memories with your spouse.  There were a lot to choose from, because God’s taught me so much! 

My criteria included aspects like:

·       Biggest lessons God has taught me
·       Memorable ways I’ve had God’s truth play out in my life
·       Posts that I’ve returned to, in order to remind myself of what I’ve learned
·       Most popular posts via web search, clicks from email, or comments back from y’all

Without further ado, let’s countdown from #10 to #6:

#10
Understanding why God knows the number of hairs on our heads, posted on August 17, 2017 – This post is by far the most web searched post on my site.  I don’t know why other than maybe people have heard that God knows the number of hairs on your head, but that saying hasn’t brought a whole lot of comfort that God knows such a trivial thing about me.  What I found in my study was that the “hairs-on-your-head” phrase had a deeper meaning to the audience Jesus spoke it to.

#9
Blindsided, posted on May 22, 2015 – When you get “that call” out of the blue, what is our best response?  When grief is overwhelming and we don’t even know how to address God, what should we do?  This was a post I returned to when my step mom passed last year.  The words in the psalm are both powerful and comforting.

#8
My daddy said “STOP!”, posted on April 4, 2019 – Although this trick-or-treating incident happened nearly 20 years ago, the story has stuck with my family.  The spiritual parallels raised powerful questions for us to consider.  I still get choked up when I read the post and remember that night.

#7
He believed in me, posted on October 6, 2022 – We believe in Jesus for eternal life (John 3:16).  But what does it mean to “believe”?  Lots of people will try to add to it, but it’s not as complicated as we make it out to be.  This truth was demonstrated to me when I was on crutches and told my director I’d be ready when the performance week came.

#6
When the house tears itself apart, posted on October 28, 2021 – Who knew that an unexpected full-home remodel from my childhood would be such a great example for how we need to study the Scriptures?  Additionally, I learned what to do when I began to suspect that an interpretation I had of a passage might not be right.

I hope you take the time to read at least one of these, and I pray that resharing what I’ve learned will be helpful to you, as well.

Next week, we’ll count down the TOP 5!

Keep Pressing,
Ken

A sharpened life (part 2)

Last time, we looked at a commonly known verse that led us to some new insights about ourselves and our relationships:

Proverbs 27:17
Iron sharpens iron,
and one person sharpens another.

Within the context of Proverbs, the sharpening that Solomon refers to is to become wise, to become skilled at life in a manner that is pleasing to God.  However, we can also learn a few things about becoming wise by thinking about the physical process of sharpening:

First, sharpening cannot be done with just one piece of iron.  Similarly, growing wise does not happen when a believer is flying solo, either.  We need other believers in our lives to sharpen us.

The Hebrew word for another means neighbor, friend, companion, or associate.  Read the proverb again, but slowly, and think about what it says with that definition:

Iron sharpens iron,
and one person sharpens their neighbor.
and one person sharpens their friend.
and one person sharpens their companion.
and one person sharpens their associate.

Each of these imply a relationship between two people, a stranger does not have the same sharpening effect on an individual’s life.  We know that is true from our own experience.  A godly friend who speaks regularly into our lives has a greater impact than a stranger who gives me a piece of his mind, or a speaker heard once at a conference, or even a pastor that preaches to me for 25 minutes every week.

The sharpening impact comes out of the relationship with another.

Secondly, sharpening isn’t a painless process.  There are sparks involved.  Whenever damaged or dulled sections of a blade are sharpened, iron is being forcefully removed or reshaped in order to make a useful, sharp edge.

Similarly, the sharpening process between two people isn’t always easy.  If I’m not willing to hear their encouragement to make the wise choice, or if I don’t want to accept their challenge of my thoughts and attitude – then sparks are going to fly between us. 

Another parallel to note is that when the sharpening process happens, the piece doing the sharpening is working with – and not against – the piece being sharpened.  It’s important for us to work with each other instead of trying to completely remake the person we’re partnering with. 

Do you have someone in your life that you have given verbal permission to sharpen you?  In order to apply Solomon’s wisdom, we must give someone permission to speak into our life AND we must be willing to work with them.

Are we willing to undergo the sharpening process?  That can be a hard question to wrestle with, especially since we know our major dull areas that need sharpening.  If you are hesitant (even a little), pray that God gives you the correct attitude.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

A sharpened life (part 1)

There are some Biblical phrases that are so common, you hear them frequently in biblical circles, but you’ll also hear it occasionally quoted by secular sources.  In studying a commonly known verse, there is a danger of an immediate (but usually internally expressed) attitude – “Oh, I already know this one” or even “Ugh, not this again”.  Behind both of those statements lurks the kind of attitude that prevents us from growing closer to God.  Pride can be brash, but it can also be subtle.  The challenge we face with familiar passages is in choosing to submit ourselves (again) to what God is communicating. 

We may learn something new.  We may simply need a reminder of what God said before.  Either way, it is wise to listen.

The verse we’re going to look at is in a section of proverbs written by Solomon that deal with the practical side of everyday life.  In it, he points out that a physical act has a spiritual parallel which will not only instruct the reader, but also implies a second lesson as well.

Proverbs 27:17
Iron sharpens iron,
and one person sharpens another.

Let’s start with the simple observation: Solomon believes that a sharpened state is better, more useful, and wiser than being an unsharpened person.

Sharp iron is useful for many things, especially when precision is needed or a particular skill is warranted – like cutting, attacking, or even farm equipment and other specific tools.

Dull iron has difficulty performing the same tasks when sharp iron is easily capable.  Ultimately, a mass of dull iron is only useful for bludgeoning and pounding things, and it is not very exact.

Similarly, Solomon proposes that the way to becoming more useful (i.e. – sharper) is through interaction with another.

I take great comfort in recognizing that Solomon says that “same stuff” can sharpen “same stuff”.  Therefore, I don’t need to purchase a special tool or program to gain wisdom.  I’m not required to find one specific type of person (like a priest or a Levite or a Seminary-trained person) in order for me to be sharpened.  There is no requirement of finding and sitting under a “spiritual guru” before I can grow.  All I need is another like me…and within the context of Proverbs that would be someone who is seeking wisdom from Yahweh, the God of the Bible.

Do you have someone in your life to sharpen you?  If not, pray that God gives you someone.  That is a prayer He is sure to answer.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Proverbial life: she is the example

This week, we’re wrapping up a topic-focused tour of the book of Proverbs.  We’ve seen that although Solomon was commenting on life roughly 3000 years ago, his observations ring loud and clear in today’s modern times.  In this series’ last blog post, we’ll look at how the book of Proverbs closes with an example of everything we’ve learned over the last nine weeks.

Interestingly, Proverbs 31 states that the chapter was written by “King Lemuel” and that this wisdom was given to him by his mother…but nothing else is known about either of these two people.  Some commentators theorize that King Lemuel was actually King Solomon, or possibly King Hezekiah, or even a fictional character made up by Solomon to demonstrate an ideal relationship between a king and his mother.

As we read through this descriptive example of a remarkable woman, look for the characteristics we’ve learned about from King Solomon:

Proverbs 31:10-31
Who can find a wife of noble character?
She is far more precious than jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will not lack anything good.
She rewards him with good, not evil, all the days of her life.

She selects wool and flax and works with willing hands.
She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from far away.
She rises while it is still night and provides food for her household
and portions for her female servants.

She evaluates a field and buys it;
she plants a vineyard wit her earnings.
She draws on her strength and reveals that her arms are strong.
She sees that her profits are good, and her lamp never goes out at night.

She extends her hands to the spinning staff,
and her hands hold the spindle.
Her hands reach out to the poor,
and she extends her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid for her household when it snows,
for all in her household are doubly clothed.
She makes her own bed coverings;
her clothing is fine linen and purple.
Her husband is known at the city gates,
where he sits among the elders of the land.
She makes and sells linen garments;
she delivers belts to the merchants.
Strength and honor are her clothing,
and she can laugh at the time to come.

Her mouth speaks wisdom,
and loving instruction is on her tongue.
She watches over the activities of her household and is never idle.
Her children rise up and call her blessed;
her husband also praises her:
“Many women have done noble deeds, but you surpass them all!”

Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting,
but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised.
Give her the reward of her labor,
and let her works praise her at the city gates.

That is an impressive description.  Here are the ways she addresses seven our proverbial life topics:

·       Truly generous: her hands reach out to the poor

·       Being intentional: she selects wool and flax…she rises while it is still night and provides…she watches over her household and is never idle

·       Dangerous infidelity: the heart of her husband trusts in her…charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised

·       Money struggles: she evaluates a field and buys it…she sees that her profits are good…she makes and sells…give her the reward of her labor

·       Societal obligations: she extends her hands to the needy…her husband is known at the city gates…let her works praise her at the city gates

·       Watch your mouth: her mouth speaks wisdom and loving instruction is on her tongue

·       Contagious attitudes: she draws on her strength and reveals that her arms are strong…she is not afraid for her household…strength and honor are her clothing

The remaining two topics we explored – “accepting correction” and “you need a friend” – do not have explicit examples in the author’s description.  While we do not want to force seeing them into the passage, I would contend that she couldn’t have become such a great example without friends and accepting correction along her path.

Now that we’ve read about and identified the qualities for the wife of noble character, remember that the book of Proverbs began with Solomon telling allegory stories of Wisdom being personified as a woman.  Finishing the book about wisdom-living with an exalted woman example creates an intriguing bookend to the entire collection of proverbs.

Whenever we come back to the book of Proverbs, we would be wise to take Solomon’s advice.  And if we want a tangible example of how these proverbs flesh out in the real world, all we need to do is read about the women at the beginning and at the end of the book.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Proverbial life: our contagious attitude

We’re taking a topic-focused tour of the book of Proverbs.  Although Solomon was commenting on life roughly 3000 years ago, his observations ring loud and clear in today’s modern times.  In this blog post, we’ll be looking at a topic that is easy for us to overlook: the impact of our attitude.

How quickly does someone else’s sour attitude twist your mindset and darken your thoughts?
How much better do you feel after talking with someone who genuinely smiles at you?
How short is your fuse when another person is unapologetically selfish in public?
Do anxious people make you feel anxious?
Can you think of someone who can change the mood of a room, for better or worse, just by walking in?

Unless we are on our guard and self-aware, we can be easily influenced by the attitudes we are exposed to.  Most of the time, the attitude shift comes from people we are in close proximity to, but we must also acknowledge that videos and clips of other people can also influence our mindset.

While we can look back and recognize times when another person’s attitude has had a profound effect on us…I think we tend to understate the impact our own attitude has on others.

Multiple times, Solomon addressed the contagiousness of an attitude from one person to the next.  When we read these proverbs, one side or the other will likely resonate.  However, the real skill in thinking through these wisdom sayings is thinking about yourself on both sides of the equation:

Proverbs 12:25
Anxiety in a person’s heart weighs it down,
but a good word cheers it up.

Are you someone who struggles with anxiety?  Do your cares weigh your heart down?  Are your fears (founded or unfounded) heavy on your mind?  If so, how much does a good word from a friend mean to you?  Admittedly, a simple check-in or conversation doesn’t cure your struggles…but empathy and compassion go a long way toward cheering your heart up.

But let’s flip this around…maybe you’re not anxious right now.  When you see someone who’s struggling (or attempting to mask the struggle), an intentional good word from you can literally be a life-saver.  However, it can be hard to know what to do when trying to help an anxious person…fortunately, Solomon gives us some guidance there, too:

Proverbs 15:30
Bright eyes cheer the heart;
good news strengthens the bones.

There are two ways to spread an attitude – through our facial expressions and our words.  Facial expressions can be tough to read because sometimes our faces betray us and don’t reveal where our minds are at.  As an example, I’ll admit to having “resting bothered face”.  I’ve been accused of being “too serious” or “too intense”, when I’m mentally at an even keel.  If you can relate, then we both should continue to work on our expressions when we interact with other people.  Bright eyes and a smile when we greet others will go a long way to communicating cheer and care, rather than them thinking we’re upset when we are not.

According to Solomon, the second way to spread a good attitude is to bring good news to others.  When someone asks how we are, do we lead with a depressing “Same stuff, different day” quip, or do we focus on sharing the good in our lives?

To further his point, Solomon offers this contrast:

Proverbs 17:22
A joyful heart is good medicine,
but a broken spirit dries up the bones.

There is nothing inherently wrong when we experience a broken spirit.  Many good things can come out of the hardest of hard situations in our lives.  However, prolonged living in such a state leaves us feeling like the life has been sucked out of us, or as Solomon aptly describes, feeling like dried up bones.  In those times we need someone to share their joyful heart with us, because their contagious attitude is good medicine.

Collectively, these proverbs leave us with a responsibility – and Solomon gives a stark warning about how much our words matter:

Proverbs 18:21
Death and life are in the power of the tongue,
and those who love it will eat its fruit.

We remember words spoken to us.  You know which ones I’m talking about.  Words you’ll never forget.  They left a life-long impression on you, whether they were life-giving or life-taking.  So don’t discount the power of your words to influence another person’s life.  There is great power in the tongue, and our words and attitudes have the ability to out-live us.

The point of these proverbs is this: You are contagious.  Your mood, your tone, your body language...are all contagious.  What do you want others to catch from you?

I'm not telling you to fake anything or manipulate anybody.  But the attitude you choose will be reflected back to you and carried on by them...so...what attitude will you choose to share with other people?

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Proverbial life: watch your mouth

We’re taking a topic-focused tour of the book of Proverbs.  Although Solomon was commenting on life roughly 3000 years ago, his observations ring loud and clear in today’s modern times.  In this blog post, we’ll be looking at a topic that trips us all up: what we say and how we say it.

Our words matter, and once they are said, there are no take-backs.  We have several familiar phrases in the English language to communicate this truth:

You can’t put the toothpaste back in the tube.
You’ve let the cat out of the bag.
You can’t unring that bell.

When Solomon was instructing his son about living wisely – how to skillfully apply knowledge to his earthly life – he frequently brought up the words his son would choose.

The first proverb we’ll look at might feel a little obvious…but sometimes we need to be reminded of the obvious:

Proverbs 11:13
A gossip goes around revealing a secret,
but a trustworthy person keeps a confidence.

Being labeled as a gossip or as a trustworthy person is a matter of verbal reputation.  You can be known as either one, but not both.  If you share another person’s secrets or words spoken in confidence, you are betraying the trust that was placed in you.  As long as keeping the secret does not bring harm to others, the best use of our words when another person shares confidential information is to not use them at all…in essence, being trustworthy is often a matter of us keeping our teeth together and saying nothing.

Next, we find Solomon addressing a common situation in life: what to do with an angry person.  Whether the anger is caused by Solomon’s son or if he happens to get caught in the cross-fire of another person’s issues, he’s going to have to navigate situations were other people are seeing red and are looking for a fight.  Curiously, Solomon does not tell him to fight fire with fire:

Proverbs 15:1
A gentle answer turns away anger,
but a harsh word stirs up wrath.

Anger is a secondary emotion.  While anger may be at the surface-level and more prominent, there is always a primary emotion found underneath, driving that angry response.  Perhaps they feel taken advantage of, or foolish, or embarrassed…whatever the root cause is, the angry outburst is almost never subdued by fighting fire with fire.  Matching anger’s intensity or deriding it with a harsh word only escalates the situation.  In these situations, Solomon wants his son to use his words to diffuse the tension – and a gentle answer is the key to doing so.

Admittedly, giving a gentle answer in the heat of the moment is hard.  Not saying anything and keeping another’s confidence is also difficult.  Thankfully, Solomon clues us in to how we can make sure our mouths are doing the right thing:

Proverbs 16:23
The heart of the wise person instructs his mouth;
it adds learning to his speech.

You’ve certainly heard descriptions of other people like, “Her mouth has a mind of its own.” or “He has a loose tongue.”  These phrases attempt to excuse a person for running their mouths or speaking before thinking…instead, Solomon says that our mouth can be instructed and trained by what we have in our heart.  So, time to do a heart check – What are you feeding your heart?  What are you learning so that you can grow and have mature speech?

The benefits of being wise with your words isn’t limited to just you.  Being able to manage your mouth is more than having a good reputation and being able to handle an angry outburst.  Solomon also tells his son that his mature words will be helpful to others:

Proverbs 16:24
Pleasant words are a honeycomb:
sweet to the taste and health to the body.

When someone speaks kind words, encouraging words, supportive words, or empathetic words to you…those are special.  They are sweetly remembered, like a mental candy, that we can retaste anytime we recall them.  Our words can make someone else strong, brave, open, and confident…healthy at many levels of the body – mental, emotional, and yes, even physical.

Words are powerful.  What comes out of our mouths can make or break someone.  How will you choose to use your words today?

Keep Pressing,
Ken