I'm not that grateful

Growing up in the church, I can remember hearing the phrase “Count your blessings” numerous times.  There was even a song in the hymnal with the same title that the congregation would occasionally sing.  The chorus lyrics were “Count your blessings, name them one by one.  Count your blessings see what God has done.”

Throughout the years, I’ve heard various sermons on the importance of having an “Attitude of Gratitude”.  At least, I remember hearing the catchy little phrase in more than a handful of talks.  As texting and social media has grown from a novelty into an integrated part of our lives, we’ve shortened the phrase “Praise the Lord” to just “PTL” and we now add a “#Blessed” to our posts.

At any point along the way, if you had asked me if I was thankful or grateful, I would have likely responded with, “Of course I am!  Have you seen my family, my house, or my job?  They’re all good – nothing’s perfect mind you, but it’s better than how I grew up and it’s probably better than I deserve.”

But as for my day-to-day living and thought process?  I’m focused solely on getting the next task done.  Gotta get ready for work.  Gotta eat.  Gotta get the kids ready.  Gotta work.  Gotta run errands.  Gotta deal with people.  Gotta walk the dog.  Gotta do…Gotta do…Gotta do…

Managing the steps to getting stuff done takes up a different section of my headspace than when I am thinking about being grateful.  If you’re like me, I have to intentionally think about being grateful…and I’ve come to the realization that I haven’t spent much time there.  Sure, I’m surfacely aware that I have had many blessings in my life, but do I intentionally practice gratitude as a habit?  No, I don’t.

A simple online search of “science and gratitude” reveals a ton of research in this area.  Overwhelmingly, the results point to an improved life for those who actively engage in gratitude activities – gratitude letter writing (whether sent or not), gratitude journaling, thankful prayer, etc.  The improvements observed in all studies almost reads like a “too-good-to-be-true” list: better sleep, less anxiety and depression, better recovery from traumatic events, more positive high-energy moods, decreased risk of drug or alcohol abuse, decreased risk of bulimia, lessening materialism and increasing in generosity, lower stress hormones and inflammatory biomarkers. 

That’s just a handful of the benefits found across all age groups: children, teens, young adults, middle-aged, senior citizens.  It honestly doesn’t matter where you are in life, what has happened to you, or how good/bad your circumstances are currently – the science repeatedly shows that intentionally chosen, routine expression of gratitude has a massive, lasting impact on our lives. 

When we look at Scripture, we find that gratefulness and thankfulness are everywhere.  Depending on your translation, the words “thank”, “thankful”, “thanks”, or “grateful” show up about 150 times.  However, further inspection shows that gratefulness is found in more than just spotting the words.  Think about the yearly feasts and celebrations God prescribed to the Israelites – they were set up to produce annual rhythms of thankfulness and remembrance of how good God had been to the nation of Israel.

In just one example of gratitude from the New Testament, Paul tells the believers in Thessalonica:

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Rejoice always, pray constantly, give thanks in everything; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

Ever wonder what God’s will is for your life?  Apparently, it is to rejoice, pray, and give thanks.  Regardless of circumstances, moods, or the amount of pain we’re dealing with.

I’m also reminded of the first verses my mom had me memorize (from the NIV84 translation):

Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.

If we acknowledge Him, which would naturally include expressing gratitude, then God will illuminate our next steps in life. 

It’s times like these that I think our modern-day science is simply catching up with what God has asked us to do – what He has wired us to do – all along.  Expressing gratitude to God shifts the focus off of us and our situation.  It causes us to become more God-focused instead of spinning our wheels in Me-ville. 

In the days after (finally) discovering this principle, I have asked my wife “What 5 things are you grateful for today?”  And you know what?  Each time I have asked, that has been the start of the best conversation of my day.  When we share what we’re grateful for, we’re revealing what we are thinking about, and saying it out loud helps to both frame and affirm how blessed we are.

I intend to ask my wife this question every day, because I think it’ll be a good way for us to connect, communicate, and get all the benefits that science has discovered…and especially the ones that God promises as well.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

What if we're wrong?

Have you ever been challenged with the question, “What if you’re wrong about Christianity?”  Maybe this question was thrown at you, like some sort of challenge, by someone who doesn’t think there is a God.  Or perhaps you have asked yourself this question, and thinking about it kept you awake last night.  To be honest, it’s a fair question.  We should examine our thoughts and understand why we believe the things that we do.  And when it comes to what we believe about our eternal destiny, it’s not wrong to think this question through – even if we feel a little uncomfortable doing so.

Most church sermons will not touch this subject.  But on the rare occasion a pastor/teacher discusses the possibility that Christ-followers have the wrong answers to eternal questions, their answer typically goes something like this:

Well, if I’m wrong…and this whole Jesus-thing isn’t true, and there isn’t a God who created all that we can see, and there won’t be a resurrection of the dead…if there’s truly nothing that happens when we die and we just cease to exist, then at least I – because of my belief system – have made the world a better place.  My efforts have made a difference in other people’s lives.

Pardon me while I go throw up this super-sugary, over-baked theological nonsense.

First of all, if there isn’t a God at all, then in the long run – nothing really matters.  The second law of thermodynamics ultimately wins as everything slides to an unenergetic equilibrium and all life as we know it will eventually cease to exist…despite any kindness or nice feelings we produced along the way.

However, the second possible “If Christians are wrong” logical conclusion is arguably worse than the first: What if there is a God, but Jesus was not who He said He was?  If there is no upcoming resurrection of the dead – no life after death – where does that leave us?

If you’ve never considered these questions or you’re feeling a little uneasy right now, don’t worry – you’re not the first person to wrestle with them.  In fact, the first-century believers in Corinth were dealing with these challenges, and here’s how Paul addressed their concerns:

1 Corinthians 15:13-14
If there is no resurrection of the dead, then not even Christ has been raised; and if Christ has not been raised then our proclamation is in vain, and so is your faith.

No punches pulled here.  If there is no life after death, then Jesus didn’t leave the tomb.  And if Jesus is still dead, then His offer of “eternal life” to those who believe in Him for it looks like a pretty lousy deal.  If He couldn’t keep Himself alive, how is He supposed to give life to anyone else?

But Paul’s reasoning doesn’t stop there.  He continues to the logical conclusion of what it means if there is no resurrection coming:

1 Corinthians 15:15, 17-19
Moreover, we are found to be false witnesses about God, because we have testified wrongly about God that He raised up Christ…and if Christ has not been raised, your faith is worthless; you are still in your sins.  Those, then, who have fallen asleep in Christ [i.e. – those who have already died believing in Jesus for eternal life] have also perished.  If we have put our hope in Christ for this life only, we should be pitied more than anyone.

Paul recognized that if his belief in Jesus for eternal life was misplaced, then his earthly life was wasted and the only thing he deserved was to be pitied more than anyone.  Paul was not using his faith in Jesus as an insurance policy.  He wasn’t hedging his bets and consoling himself with soft-soap platitudes about his “good deeds”.  Instead, Paul was convinced that he could entrust Jesus with his eternal future.  Paul believed that Jesus’ resurrection was proof of His victory over death, and that we, too, will be resurrected one day:

1 Corinthians 15:20-22
But as it is, Christ has been raised from the dead, the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep.  For since death came through a man, the resurrection of the dead also comes through a man.  For just as in Adam all die, so also in Christ all will be made alive.

We may wrestle with doubts or be asked some hard questions from time to time, but the answer to the question of “What if you’re wrong about Christianity?” ultimately comes down to how we respond to what Jesus told Martha.  Do we find Jesus to be as trustworthy as Paul did?

John 11:25-26
Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life.  The one who believes in Me, even if he dies, will live.  Everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die.  Do you believe this?”

Once you believe in Jesus for eternal life, He guarantees that you have it.  No strings.  No extra promises or actions required.  If you believe in Him, He promises resurrection, even if you experience physical death before He returns. 

Do you believe this?

Keep Pressing,
Ken

I don't know why you struggle

I’ve had glasses since I was in Kindergarten.  I’ve always detested them.  Not because of how they look, but I’ve always wanted to be able to wake up and see everything clearly.  I hate not being able to rest without smashing my glasses into my face or into the side of my head.  My frustration came to a boil in junior high, and I can still remember one exasperated conversation I had with God about it.  I wanted to be healed.  I wanted to see normally, clearly – like everyone else.  I prayed, hard.  I knew God was capable of correcting my eyesight.  I was familiar with the number of stories where Jesus healed the blind.  In desperation, I offered to give God “all the praise and glory” if He would just fix me.  But nothing changed.  No healing came, despite the number of times I shut my eyes hard and reopened them quickly, just hoping that one of those times…I’d be able to see.

I also deal with a shoulder that’s prone to dislocation, frequent migraines, and essential tremor.  Within my family, there are issues with bi-polar, various cancers, MS, fibromyalgia, high blood pressure, and Alzheimer’s (just to name a few).  I’m sure you could add your own experiences to this list.

Throughout the centuries, people have struggled with explaining why some of us deal with physical, mental, and emotional brokenness and pains.  Most explanations from able-bodied people to the disabled or impaired boil down to some form of “well, sucks to be you”.  Other explanations we may assume about ourselves are that “God is punishing me” or that “my parents messed up and I’m the one paying for it”.  Acknowledging that the world is broken may help explain the mess of aliments we see, but it doesn’t make the day-to-day activities any easier for those living with their issue.  It’s also hard to reconcile being told that we are “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14) with our list of struggles.

When we look in the Bible, we find that we’re not alone as we try to understand the imbalances we see in society:

John 9:1-2
As [Jesus] was passing by, He saw a man blind from birth.  His disciples asked Him: “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”

In first-century Jewish thinking, somebody must have messed up for this guy to be blind.  Blindness was viewed as a punishment from God.  So this would have been a natural question for the disciples to ask Jesus.  However, the answer He gave them was not one they were expecting:

John 9:3
“Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” Jesus answered.  “This came about so that God’s works might be displayed in him.”

Jesus then healed the man.  For the first time in his life, he could see clearly.  As you can imagine, this drastic change caused quite a stir among the community – especially with the religious leaders, who made the same assumptions the disciples had about the reason for the man’s blindness.

A second example I want to look at is the Apostle Paul.  When God called Paul to be His ambassador to the Gentile nations, He gave Paul specific revelations and teaching.  However, this was not the only thing God gave him:

2 Corinthians 12:7
Therefore, so that I would not exalt myself, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to torment me so that I would not exalt myself.

Paul never specified what the thorn in the flesh actually was.  Most scholars think it was some physical malady, along the lines of chronic eye issues, malaria, migraines, epilepsy, or a speech disability.  Even though the thorn’s purpose was clear – so that he wouldn’t become conceited – Paul still didn’t want it. 

2 Corinthians 12:8-9
Concerning this, I pleaded with the Lord three times that it would leave me.  But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is perfected in weakness.”

In these two examples, neither person did something to cause their physical failings or situation.  Instead, God had a purpose and a plan that actually included their struggles. 

Could the same be said of us?  I don’t know why I have the struggles that I do.  I can’t explain yours, either.  But here’s what I think is a strong possibility.  While I don’t have any direct Biblical evidence of this, given what I know of the character of God, it would not surprise me: I think that sometimes, when God sees the results of sin in this world and a non-believer gets cancer, He allows one of His own children to have that same cancer.  Not out of punishment or spite, but so that the world can see the difference in how those two individuals handle it.  So that whether you have always struggled or a specific event caused your struggle – God’s comfort, strength, compassion, and ability to change a life will shine through His kids...even though we would not have chosen our situation or we ask God to take it away.

I can’t say for sure why you have to deal with anxiety, or depression, or same-sex attraction, or cerebral palsy, or lust, or pride, or anger, or colon cancer, or any other struggle.  But God knows how you can partner with Him through it.  However life is hard for us, we can still choose our attitude about it.  May we make the same choice that Paul did after God told Him three times, “No, I won’t take it away.”  Instead of being down on himself, Paul recognized that this area of his life was where God was most visibly at work.  Not to indulge himself or give into his area of difficulty, but that God’s power helped him overcome and do great things, despite the struggle:

2 Corinthians 12:9-10
Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may reside in me.  So I take pleasure in weakness, insults, hardships, persecutions, and in difficulties, for the sake of Christ.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Unexpected and a little troubling

I read an article recently that I found rather concerning.

According to the American Bible Society’s annual State of the Bible report for 2022, roughly 26 million people had mostly or completely stopped reading the Bible in the past year.  To put that number in perspective, that’s the equivalent of everyone in the states of New York and Arizona setting down the Bible and no longer reading it.

The article I read was from Christianity Today.  You can also download the released chapters from the American Bible Society.  Each month, the ABS will release a new chapter of the study. 

Here’s a quote from the Christianity Today article:

In 2021, about 50 percent of Americans said they read the Bible on their own at least three or four times per year. That percentage had stayed more or less steady since 2011.

But in 2022, it dropped 11 points. Now only 39 percent say they read the Bible multiple times per year or more. It is the steepest, sharpest decline on record.

According to the 12th annual State of the Bible report, it wasn’t just the occasional Scripture readers who didn’t pick up their Bibles as much in 2022 either. More than 13 million of the most engaged Bible readers—measured by frequency, feelings of connection to God, and impact on day-to-day decisions—said they read God’s Word less.

Currently, only 10 percent of Americans report daily Bible reading. Before the pandemic, that number was at about 14 percent.

It’s easy to lose hope when you read numbers like that.  Makes one wonder if ministry is worth the effort.  If fewer people are making the effort to stay connected with God through His Word, then has the church failed?  Should modern-day pastors and teachers be considered unsuccessful?

But those of us who teach aren’t counted as “successful” in God’s eyes because we’ve grown our little church into a mega-church, or if we have the most followers on social media, or if we’ve reached ten thousand subscribers to our blog.  God’s definition of success is faithful labor, to work well with the gifts He has given you…regardless of how others respond – albeit positive, negative, or with apathy.

However, something encouraging was noted in the study: the researchers found that among those who “never, rarely, or seldom” read the Bible, a significant number of them are highly curious about it.  They’re wondering if the Bible, and more broadly if God has something for them.

The good news is that God can and will meet us where we are.  Whether we’ve stopped seeking Him or have never read a verse, He is still seeking us. 

John 3:16
For God loved the world in this way: He gave His one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life.

Luke 19:10
For the Son of Man [Jesus] has come to seek and to save the lost.

Just like it’s tough to operate a new piece of machinery without referring to the instruction manual, we miss out on many benefits when we decide to skip out on God’s instruction manual for life.  In fact, God rewards those who seek Him (Hebrews 11:6).  Here is a sampling of the benefits David found through his relationship with God:

Psalm 25:8-15
The Lord is good and upright; therefore He shows sinners the way.
He leads the humble in what is right and teaches them His way.
All the Lord’s ways show faithful love and truth to those who keep His covenant and decrees.
Lord, for the sake of your name, forgive my iniquity, for it is immense.

Who is this person who fears the Lord?
He will show him the way he should choose.
He will live a good life and his descendants will inherit the land.
The secret counsel of the Lord is for those who fear Him, and He reveals His covenant to them.
My eyes are always on the Lord, for He will pull my feet out of the net.

So, where do we go from here?  Based on the ABS survey, should churches just close their doors and pastors find new careers?

No, now is the time to open the doors as wide as possible.  Everyone is welcome to come and seek God.  Explore the life-giving truth found in His Word.  Spend more intentional time with God, because relationships require “together time” in order to grow.  Encourage other Christians with what God reveals to you, and then get out in the world and put it into practice – showing the same compassion to everyone that Jesus extends to us.  Doing so will enable us to be effective ambassadors for God and change agents in the world. 

And who knows?  Maybe someone will be inspired to seek the God of the Bible because you lived out what God has taught you through His Word.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Prayers about money

A few years back, a survey was conducted of people about their money habits and plans for the future.  One particular question focused in how much more money the person thought they would need to live “comfortably”.  To the surprise of the researchers, a near-universal answer came from the respondents.  The same amount was the top response of those who annually made $20k, $40k, $60k, $80k, or $100k.  Their answer:

$10,000 more

There was no “magic salary” number that everyone aimed for.  The researchers expected to hear that “if I just made 80k (or 100k), I’d be alright”.  Instead, they found that, overall, people saw themselves “just a little bit short” of their desired level for comfort. 

Are you surprised?  I was, at first.  But when I stopped to think about it…my early career salary is different from my current salary by more than $10k, and if you had asked me the same question at any point in the years between, I probably would have given a similar “just a little bit more” answer.  No massive new salary number (I don’t want to be considered ‘greedy’…), but an extra $10k?  Sign me up!

But what happens when we get that “little bit more” and then a few years later a “little bit more” than that?  As we allow our lifestyle to expand with our income, each raise becomes the new normal for us to want “just a little bit more”.

So, what’s a Christian to do with this slow slide into never being satisfied with what we have?

Paul gave Timothy a warning we should all take to heart:

1 Timothy 6:6-10
But godliness with contentment is great gain.  For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out.  If we have food and clothing, we will be content with these. 

But those who want to be rich fall into temptation, a trap, and many foolish and harmful desires, which plunge people into ruin and destruction.  For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, and by craving it, some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.

We should certainly enjoy what God has given us, but if we love the gift more than the Giver…we’re playing with fire, and we’re going to get burned.  Don’t think that poor handling of money is an indication that we are not part of God’s family – it’s not – but if our focus is wanting to be rich we’re definitely wandering away from the life God intends us to live here and now.  That path is full of self-inflicted wounds and many griefs.

Ok…so we’ve been warned, but what should we do to guard against this?

There is a proverb-prayer example, offered by a man name Agar.  He has two requests for God, and his second request provides an antidote to our money temptations:

Proverbs 30:7-9
Two things I ask of you; don’t deny them to me before I die:

Keep falsehood and deceitful words far from me.

Give me neither poverty nor wealth; feed me with the food I need.

Otherwise, I might have too much and deny you saying, “Who is the Lord?”
or I might have nothing and steal, profaning the name of my God.

Have you ever prayed that God would restrict or restrain the amount of financial blessing He provides to you?  Would you honestly be able to pray something like this?

God please don’t give me too much, don’t provide so much that I begin to think that I am the root cause of my prosperity.  I also trust you to provide enough to meet my needs so that I will not be tempted to commit a crime just to have the basics covered.

Living in between the extremes of poverty and wealth creates a livable tension for us – we have our basic needs provided for and we still recognize God’s authority over it all.  As we handle this tension, God may bless us with more resources…or He may not. 

But humbly asking God to keep our salary in check focuses our mind on the Giver, not the gift.  And that kind of prayer will certainly keep us out of the “just a little bit more” trap.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Flashback Favorite - Eternal questions

Every time we approach God’s Word, our best prayer and attitude is “God, please show me something new or remind me of something true.”

Reading the Bible, exploring God’s Word, doesn’t always have to be an expedition for new facts or theological breakthroughs. There are times we need to go back and remember something God has already taught us. Looking back can help us reinforce what we’re doing or correct us back to the right path.

Eternal questions

Originally posted on June 06, 2019

Sometimes being a Christian is tiring, right?  I mean, we may not admit it, but constantly striving to make the right choices, say encouraging things, loving people that we don’t want to, helping others, giving hard-earned money away to church or charity…and on and on and on…all these things are enough to wear us out.  And then throw in sickness and disease and selfishness and greed and all the other bad things we encounter…it can make us want to throw up our hands and fire off a few questions at God.

They were probably something along the lines of

Why am I persevering in the Christian life now?
Is all this trouble worth it in the long run?
What really happens – and does any of this matter – at the end of all things?

Those kinds of questions were not unique us.  Paul answered similar questions in both of his letter to the believers in Thessalonica.  Paul also addressed these topics with the believers in Corinth:

2 Corinthians 4:16-18
Therefore we do not give up.  Even though our outer person is being destroyed, our inner person is being renewed day by day.  For our momentary light affliction is producing for us an absolutely incomparable eternal weight of glory.  So we do not focus on what is seen, but on what is unseen.  For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

Paul then continues his comparison of our present state with our eternal destiny:

2 Corinthians 5:1-2
For we know that if our earthly tent we live in [our earthly bodies] is destroyed, we have a building from God, and eternal dwelling [a glorified, resurrection body] in the heavens, not made with hands.  Indeed, we groan in this tent, desiring to put on our heavenly dwelling…

Peter also wrote about the same things to believers:

2 Peter 3:10-13
But the day of the Lord will come like a thief; on that day the heavens will pass away with a loud noise, the elements will burn and be dissolved, and the earth and the works on it will be disclosed.  Since all these things are to be dissolved in this way, it is clear what sort of people you should be in holy conduct and godliness as you wait for the day of God…But based on His promise, we wait for new heavens and a new earth, where righteousness dwells.

During his last night on earth, one of Jesus’ final instructions to the disciples contained a peculiar promise, but it was a promise that was to motivate the disciples during the time that Jesus would no longer be physically with them:

John 14:1-3
Don’t let your heart be troubled.  Believe in God, believe also in Me.  In My Father’s house are many rooms; if not, I would have told you.  I am going away to prepare a place for you.  If I go away and prepare a place for you, I will come again and take you to myself, so that where I am you may be also.

Mentionings like these are not isolated to the New Testament either.  As just one example, God told Isaiah:

Isaiah 65:17
For I will create a new heaven and a new earth; the past events will not be remembered or come to mind.

These are just a few examples, but they show us that God has a long term course for human history planned out…and these verses confirm what we inwardly desire – relationship and purpose with our Creator.

If the world as we know it will pass away, what kind of lives should we live now?  When we feel troubled and shaken and our bodies are falling apart, Jesus wants us to trust Him and remember that He is coming back for us, to take us to a home that He designed…with us in mind.

When we recognize this longing for eternity that God has placed in our hearts, it helps us keep our present life in perspective.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

How to avoid mistakes

I am my own worst critic. 

I hate my mistakes.  I hate my mess ups.  I especially despise making them in front of other people. 

Even when I was a kid, I hated to practice my saxophone or acting script with others in the house…because I didn’t want anyone hearing the number of times I’d mess it up before finally figuring out the melody or how I wanted to say a memorized line. 

As a teen, I figured out how to stay in my lane with things that worked for me.  Doing so only allowed people to see my successes.  Combine that with avoiding the things you’re bad at, and suddenly everyone assumes that you’re good at everything.

As I became an adult, I didn’t get any better.  But when you become a husband and a father…there’s no hiding your mistakes anymore.  Because of the proximity of day-to-day living, my flaws were glaringly obvious to my wife and – despite my best efforts – they were also mirrored back to me by my young sons.

There were many options available for how I was going to deal with my inability to maintain a “perfect-looking” façade – I could use denial, I could use anger to deflect attention from my mistakes, I could double-down and work harder at not messing up, or I could avoid discussing them altogether.  None of these options are mutually exclusive either…I could mix and match to whatever situation I found myself in.

Fortunately, a better help came along.

His name was Joe.

Joe took me, a 25 year old husband/father/know-it-all, and mentored me.  He taught me how to study the Bible, how to read the meaning out of the text instead of putting my own thinking into the text.  He taught me how to teach.  He loved me.  He invested in me.  Through his efforts, “Old Joe” (as he often called himself) put his arm around my shoulders, telling me “This is how we do this.  This is how a Christian man lives for God, with eternity in mind.” 

He was very good at referencing the book of Proverbs, which focuses on wisdom, being skilled at living before God.  I’ll give you some examples of how he quoted them and also lived them out:

First example:

I’d see him at least every Sunday at church, and we’d be in touch frequently during the week.  We’d talk about work, family upbringing, frustrations, raising kids, loving a wife who struggles with bi-polar disorder, everything…including making mistakes.

Joe always told me: “I’ve already made all the mistakes.  If you listen to me, you won’t have to make them, too.”  He was right…listening to him helped me either avoid messing up on something I wasn’t prepared for, or his advice was able to help me deal with my faults and move forward in a healthy, Godly manner.

Proverbs 19:20
Listen to counsel and receive instruction so that you may be wise later in life.

Second example:

Most of the time I was happy to see him, but there were occasions where I dreaded speaking with him – because I knew I was struggling and I knew he was going to call me out.  I have to admit that his corrections were always kindly delivered, but I just didn’t always want to talk about my struggles.  I even avoided him a few Sundays…and when I eventually came back around, he was still there for me.

Proverbs 27:6
Wounds of a friend are trustworthy, but the kisses of an enemy are excessive.

Third example:

He mentored me from my mid-twenties to my mid-thirties, but “Old Joe” was at the other end of the spectrum.  He didn’t have to share the lessons he’d learned over the years, but he wanted to invest in the next generation of disciples.  He had lived for God for many decades.  As such, he was skilled in wisdom and right-living…but it wasn’t something that he kept to himself.

Proverbs 16:31
Gray hair is a glorious crown; it is found in the ways of righteousness.

It’s been many years since I last saw him.  Due to health reasons, he and his wife had to move closer to family.  “Old Joe” went to heaven at the end of 2017, but his impact still echoes on this side of eternity.  You can read more about his influence on my life here.

I don’t have a full head of grey hair yet, but there’s more with each passing year.  I’m thankful for the years that God has allowed me to serve Him, and that He continues to teach me the ways of righteousness and right-living. 

A few weeks back, I even used Joe’s quote.  During a group discussion after church, I pointed to a friend of mine who is close to my age, turned to a young couple, and said: We’ve already made all the mistakes.  If you listen to us, you won’t have to make them, too. 

I hope they applied what we talked about.  I hope they’re able to avoid or manage mistakes better because of our example, and the example that was set for me by Joe.

I urge you to do the same.  If you’re wearing a crown of grey hair, then please invest in the young ones.  And if you’re a young one, find an older believer to help you walk with wisdom…and learn early how to avoid mistakes.

Keep Pressing
Ken

Our response to a broken world

There is no denying that we live in a broken world.  It feels like everywhere we turn, there are stories of war, pain, suffering, sickness, mental illnesses, physical injuries, natural disasters, and the list could go on and on.  In addition to our own daily experience, we know that there are other painful situations that we are vaguely aware of but have no direct connection with those situations.

It’s easy to become overwhelmed when we consider the sheer volume of pain in the world.  We can feel completely overpowered and paralyzed with our inability to fix it all.   To avoid the overwhelmed feelings, our path of least resistance is to “stay in our lane” and avoid anyone else’s pain.  We tend to compartmentalize the pain we know of and avoid the other pains we don’t want to know about.  Since we can’t mentally process all the world’s pain and suffering, we rationalize our efforts to avoid any pain in our own lives. 

“I’ll handle mine and God can handle the rest.”

But is that really our best response? 

Solomon addressed this topic when writing his portion of the book of Proverbs.  But before we look at what he wrote, we need to remember a few interpretive ground-rules:

·       The book of Proverbs was written before Jesus came to earth.  Before the cross.  Before the mystery of the church was revealed (Ephesians 1-2).  As such, we cannot expect this passage to be about how to obtain eternal life and avoid eternal death.

·       Proverbs are wisdom sayings that illuminate something that is proverbially true.  These are probabilities that are focused on skilled living on earth.

·       The law of sowing and reaping is prevalent throughout the book of Proverbs.  Sow bad deeds and receive punishment; or sow good deeds, and then reap rewards.  Essentially, “you reap what you sow”.

With that context, let’s see what Solomon had to say about our response to our broken world:

Proverbs 24:10
If you do nothing in a difficult time, your strength is limited.

There are many ways that we can be strong – strong physically, strong mentally, strong financially, strong skills, etc.  However, no matter what our God-given strengths are, if we do nothing in a difficult time, our strengths have little to no impact.  In hard times, not stepping in with our strength has the same outcome as if we didn’t have these strengths and abilities.

So what should we do instead?

Proverbs 24:11
Rescue those being taken off to death,
and save those stumbling toward slaughter.

Solomon isn’t talking about helping someone who is willfully throwing their life away.  He’s saying watch for those being taken off and carried away or those who are unknowingly stumbling toward a terrible outcome.  The homeless child, the teen with only social media role models, the immigrant who doesn’t understand our country’s culture and various social customs – these are examples of the people Solomon says we should watch for, with the aim to rescue them from unforeseen trouble.

Most of the time, we’re afraid to step into the uncertainty and uncomfortableness of these kinds of situations.  It’s so much easier to turn a blind eye – if we don’t make the effort, then we won’t know what’s really happening…and if we don’t know what’s really happening, then we can’t be held responsible for not doing anything…right?

Solomon disagrees:

Proverbs 24:12
If you say, “But we didn’t know about this,”
won’t He who weighs hearts consider it?
Won’t He who protects your life know?
Won’t He repay a person according to his work?

Since God weighs hearts (see 1 Samuel 16:7), He knows our true intentions as well as what amount of good we’re capable of doing if we put in the effort.  God is the one who protects your life and gives you your strength.  Can we honestly ask God for blessings if we’re unwilling to use what we already have to help protect the vulnerable?

I know that we can’t relieve all the world’s pain and suffering, but that’s not an excuse to avoid getting involved somewhere at some level.  What kind of impact would we have if we leveraged our strengths to rescue those who have no hope?  What would our actions tell the world about our God?  Use the strength you have to help where you can:

Are you financially strong?  Then give generously to organizations that rescue the vulnerable.
Are you physically strong?  Then help those who cannot help themselves.
Are you emotionally strong?  Then be a compassionate outlet to the lonely.
Are you mentally strong?  Then teach skills to those who can’t afford a tutor.

Times are difficult now.  If we do nothing, then our strength is limited and God’s gifts to us are wasted. 

However, if we sow using our God-given strengths, we can trust God will use our efforts and He will repay our work. 

We would be wise to weigh our own hearts in these matters – because God will be doing the same.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Taking out the trash

Recently, I saw a thought-provoking Facebook post shared by a friend:

When you throw the trash out, do you go outside later and check how it’s doing? No?
So stop talking to your ex.

Of course, for this to be true, the caveat is that there are no kids from that relationship.  But haven’t we all seen this behavior when a relationship ends poorly?  I knew a guy who struggled like that.  He was on-again-off-again with a girl and even when his friends were telling him to stay away, he’d reply telling us, “I know, but I can’t help but go back.”

In his mind, he was stuck.  He had hitched his wagon to this girl and was going to go wherever she would lead him – no matter how much pain, fighting, grief, and stress would come.  He may not have used this exact wording, but he really was enslaved to her.  He had done it to himself, and he saw no way out.

There is a proverb that goes along perfectly with his situation:

Proverbs 26:11
As a dog returns to its vomit,
so also a fool repeats his foolishness

It’s easy to identify this cyclical self-destructive-enslaved behavior in others.  When you see them go back – yet again – it just boggles the mind.  As soon as a dog throws up, it immediately starts to lick up the vomit.  Similarly, without even thinking about it, a fool jumps right back into his foolishness.  And when that fool is your friend or a family member…you can feel pretty helpless.

If you are fortunate enough to have a good romantic relationship, it can be easy to get a little snooty about those who struggle in this manner.  But the truth is, Christians struggle with this same behavior…not always in an amorous sense, but the same self-destructive-enslaved behavior is often closer than we care to admit.  Ever “slip back into an old habit”?  Ever have a tough day and seek comfort in an old vice?  Ever get caught off-guard or become so embarrassed that you flame-spray whomever bumped you?  Ever get mad enough to threaten violence?

Paul addressed this struggle when he wrote to the believers in Rome.  Although he wrote to a group of people who were already saved and part of the local house churches, Paul took them through the entire scope of a believer’s experience: The failings of humanity (Romans 1:18-3:20), how one becomes right with God (Romans 3:21-5:11), and how to live the victorious Christian life (Romans 5:12-8:39).

It’s in the third section that Paul discusses how we can deal with the conflict inside us – between our new nature and our old nature, the Spirit of God in us vs. our physical fleshly bodies.  The first part to defeating the cyclical self-destructive-enslaved behavior involves our mindset:

Romans 6:6-11
For we know that our old self was crucified with Him so that the body ruled by sin might be rendered powerless so that we may no longer be enslaved to sin, since a person who has died is freed from sin.  Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with Him, because we know that Christ, having been raised from the dead, will not die again.  Death no longer rules over Him.

For the death He died, He died to sin once for all time; but the life He lives, He lives to God.  So, you too consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus.

When we believe in Jesus for eternal life, we are identified with Jesus and declared righteous before God.  As a result, Jesus is now our example.  Since we are identified with the once for all time death He died, Paul tells us to shift our thinking about our cyclical self-destructive-enslaved behavior.  He says to consider yourselves dead to sin.  Those old feelings, thoughts, habits, and vices have all been taken out with the trash.  Don’t go back out and check on them.  Instead consider yourselves…alive to God in Christ Jesus.

But practically speaking, our minds aren’t the only battle ground for this struggle.  Sometimes, we still want to be the way we were before.  It felt good (in the moment) and our body craves going back.  That’s why the second part to defeating the cyclical self-destructive-enslaved behavior involves how we use our physical body:

Romans 6:12-13
Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body, so that you obey its desires.  And do not offer any parts of it to sin as weapons for unrighteousness.  But as those who are alive from the dead, offer yourselves to God, and all the parts of yourselves to God as weapons for righteousness.

Once we see ourselves clearly, it’s time to flip the script on how we use our bodies.  I don’t think Paul is being metaphorical here with this “body talk”.  Wherever you struggle, make that a point of emphasis to good things instead:

Has your tongue been used for gossip?  Now purposely be encouraging.
Have your hands been violent?  Find ways to help others. 
Were you sexually promiscuous?  Offer your body only to your spouse. 
Have your feet taken you to places that make you stumble?  Go to places that build you up.

Changing your mindset is not easy.  Physically doing these things is not easy, either.  It takes practice and sacrifice.  However, these changes do not go unnoticed by God.  Later on, Paul adds this:

Romans 12:1-2
Therefore, brothers and sisters, in view of the mercies of God, I urge you to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God; this is your true worship.  Do not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God.

Renewing our minds and offering our bodies for good is pleasing to God.  And don’t miss what God gives in return – the ability to recognize the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God.

The good news is you don’t have to live trapped inside the cyclical self-destructive-enslaved behavior.  Jesus is our example for the way out.

Keep Pressing,
Ken

Pause on offense

If there’s any phrase that’s been thrown around too much in the last ten years, I think we can all agree that “I’m offended!” is it.  It seems like everyone is offended about something, right?

Typically, I’ve seen two opposing responses to someone taking offense.  On the one hand, we have someone who immediately pulls back and apologizes for any offense taken.  This person seems to believe that causing an offense is the worst thing one person could do to another.  On the other hand, we have someone else who hardens up and becomes recalcitrant in their behavior.  They claim that dealing with an offense is the sole responsibility of the one who is offended.  I’ve even witnessed some people being intentionally offensive, in an attempt to prove their point.

But where is a Christian supposed to live in this spectrum?  Timid, obstinate, or somewhere in between?  Does loving others mean that we’re going to acquiesce to another’s personal preferences or feelings?  Or does love need to be “tough” on those who wilt at the notion of conflict or differences?

While I do not think there is a hard-and-fast rule for our most loving response in all situations, I am thankful that Jesus provides us with an example in a situation He found Himself in. 

Before we step into the scene, we need a little context.  The Old Testament directed that at the annual census, each person over the age of 20 was to give a half-shekel offering to the Lord in support of the tabernacle.  This “temple tax” was collected annually across the nation.  It was not without controversy, either.  Some people believed that the temple tax was only to be paid once per lifetime; whereas others insisted that it was an annual offering.

The temple tax collectors were Jews who were working in the service of the temple, not the Roman occupiers.  What is not clear from the text is if they are simply doing their job, or if they were attempting to be clever with their question in order to draw Jesus into the debate and possibly accuse Him of not supporting the temple.

Whichever motive is true, Jesus’ handling of the situation is fascinating:

Matthew 17:24-26
When they came to Capernaum, those who collected the temple tax approached Peter and said, “Doesn’t your teacher pay the temple tax?”
“Yes,” he said.
When he went into the house, Jesus spoke to him first, “What do you think, Simon?  From whom do earthly kings collect tariffs or taxes?  From their sons or from strangers?”
“From strangers,” he said.
“Then the sons are free,” Jesus told him.

Let’s pause right here.  Jesus is not merely teaching Peter a lesson in tax law.  Instead, He’s making a statement on Peter’s position in God’s family.  As the Son of God, Jesus is exempt from the temple tax.  However, Jesus is also including Peter as part of God’s family.  Earlier, Jesus stated that whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother (Matthew 12:50).  And just what is this “will of my Father”?  The apostle John quoted Jesus on this very phrase:

John 6:40
For this is the will of my Father: that everyone who sees the Son and believes in Him will have eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day.

Those who believe in Jesus for eternal life are now part of the Father’s family!  On top of the multitude of benefits familyhood brings, in their current situation, Peter is just like Jesus – exempt from the temple tax.

So…what should Peter do with this new understanding of who he is as a member of God’s family?  As a practical matter, the temple tax collector is still waiting outside, expecting Peter to come out with the money.  What would you do?  Begrudgingly pay it?  Yell at the guy to go away?  Forcefully tell him about your rights as a child of God, and that you are exempt from his earthly governing rules?

When we read the next directions that Jesus gave to Peter, most people focus on the fantastical way Jesus provided the money.  Instead, I want us to focus on why Jesus was still going to pay, even though He said that the sons are free:

Matthew 17:27
“But, so we won’t offend them, go to the sea, cast in a fishhook, and take the first fish that you catch.  When you open its mouth you’ll find a coin.  Take it and give it to them for me and you.”

Jesus says that they’ll still pay (even though they rightfully don’t have to) so the temple tax collectors won’t be offended.  The Greek word translated as offend – skandalizo – means to put a stumbling block or impediment in the way, upon which another may trip and fall, or metaphorically, to offend.  The temple tax collector wasn’t part of God’s Family…and so to avoid making him stumble in his interaction with those who are in God’s Family, Jesus set aside His rights as a son.  Jesus chose to pay a tax that He did not have to in order to keep the path clear for someone else to believe in Him for eternal life and join the family.

Jesus modeled how to avoid an offense so that a relationship can be maintained.  Even if Jesus or Peter chose to confront the tax collector with an argument about their rights as sons…what good would it have done in this situation?  The temple tax collector didn’t set the policy.  He doesn’t make the decisions about who pays and who does not pay.  In this instance, the tax collector is simply the messenger and blasting him with arguments – even valid ones – does not accomplish anything…but it would place a stumbling block in His way to seeing Jesus as the Messiah.

Our take-away principle is clear: There are bigger issues than my individual rights, especially when it comes to keeping the path to God clear of stumbling blocks for others.  If Jesus can set aside His rights to avoid an offense, so can I.

Keep Pressing,
Ken